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Not All Press Is Good Press and Not All PR Clients Are Worth The Headache

Any publicist worth their rate can handle crisis PR; the thing is, some of us have zero interest in having problematic clients.

I am one of those publicists who isn’t about the drama.

So when someone I had briefly subcontracted with referred a reality TV personality to me to consider repping a few years ago, I asked why they thought I’d be interested. It got very, very quiet because they didn’t know what to say for several reasons, but the first was that they assumed all publicists are alike — they learned that day we are not.

Some of us have maintained our ethics and integrity, and we aren’t simply in it for the money. Some of us want to rep people and brands that we believe in, and that makes us highly selective.

Now, going back to the referral, you see this wasn’t just your run-of-the-mill type of reality TV personality that leans heavily into narcissism, is devoid of true talent, and requires so much attention to feel self-worth that they feel the need to make a profession out of doing the same tired, trashy reality TV circuit of overtly dramatic programs. On top of that, the individual they referred was also navigating a criminal legal matter at the time.

I asked them point blank,

‘Why did you think I would onboard this problem into my world?’

Again, some of us are just built different.

Today I read about a couple of other publicists in the trades because, ultimately, when you are tied to problematic energy within your client base, it will inevitably spill over into your own life. Greed isn’t an energy worth being tied to because, eventually, life will make you pay more than your fair share.

I maintain a manageable work/life balance because I don’t rep assholes and because I don’t conduct business like one.

You don’t have to create smear campaigns when you align yourself with professionals who operate with integrity; that’s what I’m about.

Everything else is drama.

Not all press is good press, and not all money is good money.

ABOUT DYLAN THOMAS COTTER:

Rebel with a cause, driven by authenticity, self-expression, and liberation for all.

Rev. Dylan Thomas Cotter is a strategist, public relations leader, and brand communications executive with more than fifteen years of experience at the intersection of entertainment, media, and technology.

Cotter is known for securing numerous Tier 1 (top-tier) and Tier 2 media placements across key markets including but not limited to:

The Associated Press, Fortune, Playboy, GQ, Rolling Stone, ABC News, Out Magazine, The Advocate, Pride, Inked Magazine, Real Simple, VICE, KTLA, Reader’s Digest, Mashable, Yahoo! News, Yahoo! Life UK, Newsweek, Men’s Health, Parade Magazine, Betches, U.S. News & World Report, Women’s Health Magazine, Women.com, South China Morning Post, Truthout, MIC, The Manual, Curl Magazine, International BusinessTimes UK, TechRound, GB News, The Irish Star US, The Mirror US, Daily Express U.S., MSN, AOL, UNILAD, Morning Honey, News9Live, Business Times, ClickOrlando, News4JAX, East Bay Times, Newsday, Midland Reporter-Telegram, El Paso Inc., SRN News, WRAL, Marietta Daily Journal, Yahoo, YourValley, Henry Herald, Times Union, TheIndependent, INkl, Netscape, WSB Radio, Taylorville Daily News, The Seattle Times, FOX Illinois, The Gazette, Stamford Advocate, New Haven Register, CT Post, Lakeland Today, SFGATE, WSLS 10, NC News Online, Courier News, Delco Times, The Republic, StarBeacon, Daily Journal, Temple Daily Telegram, The Toronto Star, WJTV, Winnipeg FreePress, KFOR, TribLIVE, The Hour, KTAR, WTOP, Daily Press, MyStateline, SeattlePI, NewsChannel 20, The Mercury News, Oskaloosa Herald, The Korea Times, MyNorthwest, Greenfield Reporter, Antigo Journal, Voice of Alexandria, Union-Bulletin, Gwinnett Daily Post, WBAL, WVNews, YourSourceOne, WINK News, Mankato Free Press, Audacy, Goshen News, KRQE, HNG News, CBS 17, FOX 40, KSNT, Western SlopeNow, FOX 44 News, KDVR, News 13, WGN Radio, NVDaily, MyMotherLode.com, The Hamilton Spectator, Daily News-Record, The Washington Times, KTVO, DailyIndependent, WFMJ, Fine Day Radio, WSB-TV, Local 10, Messenger-Inquirer, Click2Houston, The News-Item, KSAT, OA Online, KIRO 7, The Sun Chronicle, KARK, RiverBender, Laredo Morning Times, San Francisco Chronicle, The News-Times, CTInsider, Beaumont Enterprise, Manistee News Advocate, The Telegraph, Michigan’s Thumb, Chron, KHQA, The Intelligencer, EverythingLubbock, The Virginian-Pilot, MyPlainview, Your Conroe News, GMToday, WFMZ, SSBCrack News, Wenatchee World, News 10, Emirates 24/7, VIN News, Hartford Courant, Philippine Daily Inquirer, Silicon Valley, Ground News, Japan Today, The Washington Post, Boston 25 News, Butler Eagle, Livingston Enterprise, Ottumwa Courier, Dayton Daily News, LimaOhio, Guard Online, 990 The Answer, Indianapolis Business Journal, PHL17, ABC27, EDGE Media Network, Telemundo Nebraska, The Columbian, 1010 WINS, WPHT, KY W Newsradio, WB C O Radio, WBBM Newsradio, KMOX, WWJ Newsradio, KNX News 97.1 FM, WTIC, WWL, KMBZ, WILK Newsradio, WBEN, Talk 1370, WPXI, Times Leader, ABC4

His latest books, Dear Cisgender Reader Walk Beside Me: An Invitation to Understanding My Big, Exciting Gay Transgender Life and Think Like a Transgender Thought Leader, are out now.

I Don’t Pay For Press. I Specialize in Earned Media.

I am a publicist. I don’t pay for press because I earn it, and this will be a learning experience for those who seem to need it who’ve approached me to pay for press.

The irony of specializing in earned media (view case study), only to be asked by a tech conference for me to pay them to interview me about my expertise in earned media, is in a word, wild, and not gonna happen for many reasons.

C’mon people!

I swear people see the word ‘entertainment’ and/or ‘Hollywood’ and the dollar signs, and the opportunists’ unhinged expectations come out.

Trust me, it’s not just the tech industry; it’s other LGBTQ publications as well — you all know better, so do better.

For those of you keeping score, here are all the publications that I haven’t paid and have retained placements in:

The Associated Press, Fortune, Playboy, GQ, Rolling Stone, ABC News, Out Magazine, The Advocate, Pride, Inked Magazine, Real Simple, VICE, KTLA, Reader’s Digest, Mashable, Yahoo! News, Yahoo! Life UK, Newsweek, Men’s Health, Parade Magazine, Betches, U.S. News & World Report, Women’s Health Magazine, Women.com, South China Morning Post, Truthout, MIC, The Manual, Curl Magazine, International BusinessTimes UK, TechRound, GB News, The Irish Star US, The Mirror US, Daily Express U.S., MSN, AOL, UNILAD, Morning Honey, News9Live, Business Times, ClickOrlando, News4JAX, East Bay Times, Newsday, Midland Reporter-Telegram, El Paso Inc., SRN News, WRAL, Marietta Daily Journal, Yahoo, YourValley, Henry Herald, Times Union, TheIndependent, INkl, Netscape, WSB Radio, Taylorville Daily News, The Seattle Times, FOX Illinois, The Gazette, Stamford Advocate, New Haven Register, CT Post, Lakeland Today, SFGATE, WSLS 10, NC News Online, Courier News, Delco Times, The Republic, StarBeacon, Daily Journal, Temple Daily Telegram, The Toronto Star, WJTV, Winnipeg FreePress, KFOR, TribLIVE, The Hour, KTAR, WTOP, Daily Press, MyStateline, SeattlePI, NewsChannel 20, The Mercury News, Oskaloosa Herald, The Korea Times, MyNorthwest, Greenfield Reporter, Antigo Journal, Voice of Alexandria, Union-Bulletin, Gwinnett Daily Post, WBAL, WVNews, YourSourceOne, WINK News, Mankato Free Press, Audacy, Goshen News, KRQE, HNG News, CBS 17, FOX 40, KSNT, Western SlopeNow, FOX 44 News, KDVR, News 13, WGN Radio, NVDaily, MyMotherLode.com, The Hamilton Spectator, Daily News-Record, The Washington Times, KTVO, DailyIndependent, WFMJ, Fine Day Radio, WSB-TV, Local 10, Messenger-Inquirer, Click2Houston, The News-Item, KSAT, OA Online, KIRO 7, The Sun Chronicle, KARK, RiverBender, Laredo Morning Times, San Francisco Chronicle, The News-Times, CTInsider, Beaumont Enterprise, Manistee News Advocate, The Telegraph, Michigan’s Thumb, Chron, KHQA, The Intelligencer, EverythingLubbock, The Virginian-Pilot, MyPlainview, Your Conroe News, GMToday, WFMZ, SSBCrack News, Wenatchee World, News 10, Emirates 24/7, VIN News, Hartford Courant, Philippine Daily Inquirer, Silicon Valley, Ground News, Japan Today, The Washington Post, Boston 25 News, Butler Eagle, Livingston Enterprise, Ottumwa Courier, Dayton Daily News, LimaOhio, Guard Online, 990 The Answer, Indianapolis Business Journal, PHL17, ABC27, EDGE Media Network, Telemundo Nebraska, The Columbian, 1010 WINS, WPHT, KY W Newsradio, WB C O Radio, WBBM Newsradio, KMOX, WWJ Newsradio, KNX News 97.1 FM, WTIC, WWL, KMBZ, WILK Newsradio, WBEN, Talk 1370, WPXI, Times Leader, ABC4

That’s not bragging, that’s business.

Frankly, unless you understand how the business of media really works, there are a lot of people out here with a lot of ‘great opportunities’ for visibility that’ll drain your wallet while simultaneously filling their own.

If you need help navigating the media landscape, I have an opening for one PR client with integrity, a solid budget, and a clear brand vision. Pitch me on why I should work with you. And if you can’t afford a publicist, take my free earned media class online and earn media for yourself.

To your success.

ABOUT DYLAN THOMAS COTTER:

Rebel with a cause, driven by authenticity, self-expression, and liberation for all.

Rev. Dylan Thomas Cotter is a strategist, public relations leader, and brand communications executive with more than fifteen years of experience at the intersection of entertainment, media, and technology.

Cotter is known for securing numerous Tier 1 (top-tier) and Tier 2 media placements across key markets including but not limited to:

The Associated Press, Fortune, Playboy, GQ, Rolling Stone, ABC News, Out Magazine, The Advocate, Pride, Inked Magazine, Real Simple, VICE, KTLA, Reader’s Digest, Mashable, Yahoo! News, Yahoo! Life UK, Newsweek, Men’s Health, Parade Magazine, Betches, U.S. News & World Report, Women’s Health Magazine, Women.com, South China Morning Post, Truthout, MIC, The Manual, Curl Magazine, International BusinessTimes UK, TechRound, GB News, The Irish Star US, The Mirror US, Daily Express U.S., MSN, AOL, UNILAD, Morning Honey, News9Live, Business Times, ClickOrlando, News4JAX, East Bay Times, Newsday, Midland Reporter-Telegram, El Paso Inc., SRN News, WRAL, Marietta Daily Journal, Yahoo, YourValley, Henry Herald, Times Union, TheIndependent, INkl, Netscape, WSB Radio, Taylorville Daily News, The Seattle Times, FOX Illinois, The Gazette, Stamford Advocate, New Haven Register, CT Post, Lakeland Today, SFGATE, WSLS 10, NC News Online, Courier News, Delco Times, The Republic, StarBeacon, Daily Journal, Temple Daily Telegram, The Toronto Star, WJTV, Winnipeg FreePress, KFOR, TribLIVE, The Hour, KTAR, WTOP, Daily Press, MyStateline, SeattlePI, NewsChannel 20, The Mercury News, Oskaloosa Herald, The Korea Times, MyNorthwest, Greenfield Reporter, Antigo Journal, Voice of Alexandria, Union-Bulletin, Gwinnett Daily Post, WBAL, WVNews, YourSourceOne, WINK News, Mankato Free Press, Audacy, Goshen News, KRQE, HNG News, CBS 17, FOX 40, KSNT, Western SlopeNow, FOX 44 News, KDVR, News 13, WGN Radio, NVDaily, MyMotherLode.com, The Hamilton Spectator, Daily News-Record, The Washington Times, KTVO, DailyIndependent, WFMJ, Fine Day Radio, WSB-TV, Local 10, Messenger-Inquirer, Click2Houston, The News-Item, KSAT, OA Online, KIRO 7, The Sun Chronicle, KARK, RiverBender, Laredo Morning Times, San Francisco Chronicle, The News-Times, CTInsider, Beaumont Enterprise, Manistee News Advocate, The Telegraph, Michigan’s Thumb, Chron, KHQA, The Intelligencer, EverythingLubbock, The Virginian-Pilot, MyPlainview, Your Conroe News, GMToday, WFMZ, SSBCrack News, Wenatchee World, News 10, Emirates 24/7, VIN News, Hartford Courant, Philippine Daily Inquirer, Silicon Valley, Ground News, Japan Today, The Washington Post, Boston 25 News, Butler Eagle, Livingston Enterprise, Ottumwa Courier, Dayton Daily News, LimaOhio, Guard Online, 990 The Answer, Indianapolis Business Journal, PHL17, ABC27, EDGE Media Network, Telemundo Nebraska, The Columbian, 1010 WINS, WPHT, KY W Newsradio, WB C O Radio, WBBM Newsradio, KMOX, WWJ Newsradio, KNX News 97.1 FM, WTIC, WWL, KMBZ, WILK Newsradio, WBEN, Talk 1370, WPXI, Times Leader, ABC4

His latest books, Dear Cisgender Reader Walk Beside Me: An Invitation to Understanding My Big, Exciting Gay Transgender Life and Think Like a Transgender Thought Leader, are out now.

PR TIP: Stop Hitting People Up for Things in Your Introductions, Start Providing Value

The assumption that press and visibility equal financial success should be studied and should also cease. Because how do people arrive at that?

The professional expectations and messages that I’ve received from people who assume they know exactly where I am financially in my business are wild, as I need people to have some perspective before they reach out or at least read my frequently asked questions section.

You can be known in the media and not well supported by the general public, by your own community, by many people, and that’s where I am as a gay transgender publicist and media activist. You see, in terms of my media activism, I put my money where my mouth is time and time again, and that works against me financially, but not one single individual factors that into account when they send an introduction email, because most often they are seeking an opportunity from me.

Unless we’ve had a conversation specifically about my business, you are not privy to it. I don’t like being approached in a way where people project assumptions upon me.

The only way I was able to go to this upcoming convention is because I sought out and applied for resources that I was lucky enough to be considered for and also because my partner believes enough in me to help me.

I have had to go out, become self-taught on my skills, seek resources, and create every single media opportunity that I have had in my career, and have yet to see an ROI on my time financially, outside of my press visibility, which is quantifiable in web traffic, not dollars and cents—all the while going through this world with my own set of circumstances, which have been detailed in many of my books, that have also gone unsupported by those who first seek to hit me up for donations, advertising funds, and/or job opportunities that I do not have to offer.

I’ll leave you all with this: some of us can be so damn good at PR that the general public starts to create a story in their head about what our lives are like; until you speak to someone or read books about their life, you’ll never truly know what they face daily or what they’ve built with little to no support, all under pressure and with people thinking everything was handed to us because of how we appear now. I am a dedicated 43-year-old work in progress, not an overnight success. Please keep in mind what chapter you are entering someone’s life story in, because there’s always a backstory that you haven’t yet read.

I have been successful as a publicist in landing placements because I do not hit people up for anything; I provide relevant value to their careers and/or projects. One day I’d like to open my inbox and have some of that energy reciprocated.

ABOUT DYLAN THOMAS COTTER:

Rebel with a cause, driven by authenticity, self-expression, and liberation for all.

Rev. Dylan Thomas Cotter is a strategist, public relations leader, and brand communications executive with more than fifteen years of experience at the intersection of entertainment, media, and technology.

Cotter is known for securing numerous Tier 1 (top-tier) and Tier 2 media placements across key markets including but not limited to The Associated Press, Fortune, ABC News, GQ, Rolling Stone, Out Magazine, The Advocate, Pride, Inked Magazine, Real Simple, VICE, KTLA, Reader’s Digest, Mashable, Yahoo! News, Yahoo! Life UK, Newsweek, Men’s Health, Parade Magazine, Betches, U.S. News & World Report, Women’s Health Magazine, NursingColleges.com, Women.com, South China Morning Post, Truthout, MIC, The Manual, Curl Magazine, International Business Times UK, TechRound, GB News, The Irish Star US, The Mirror, MSN and AOL.

Cotter advises founders, artists, and executives on brand positioning, reputation, corporate social responsibility, and strategic communications. As an openly gay transgender professional, Dylan Thomas Cotter is committed to fostering inclusive, respectful, and affirming work environments.

His latest books, Dear Cisgender Reader Walk Beside Me: An Invitation to Understanding My Big, Exciting Gay Transgender Life and Think Like a Transgender Thought Leader, are out now.